Tag Archives: Understanding

A Short Story About the Power of Understanding – Part II

In the previous part I started writing a little story that I imagined one night while I was watching the stars. This short story is about the power of understanding. It is a way to see how different everything could be if we could be less judgmental and more understanding with each other. Hope you enjoy it!

 

 

"Everything that irritates us about others can lead us to an understanding of ourselves." - Carl Jung  

 

 

He started seeing flashing images, they were passing quickly through his eyes like a movie. As the images were passing, he started to recognize the kid in the images, it was the life of this kid in little images. As they were passing, the little kid was getting older, and suddenly he recognized completely who it was: It was his neighbor, a shy and quiet boy of about 20 years of age. The man has always criticized and judged this boy, because he was different, he always referred him as the “suicide boy” because he was lonely and never smiled. The images keep passing through his eyes, until they stopped.

 

The man remained motionless for almost 15 minutes, and suddenly, he broke into tears. What he saw in those images was the 20 years of life of this boy. The magic about the shoes he tried was that not only made him see the life of the boy he always criticized but he could felt what he also felt in different moments of his life. He understood why he was the way he was. This boy has been through a lot of hardship in his short life. And in the present, he was taking care of her sick and drunk mother, because his father ran away when he was born.  Suddenly, he realized that this boy, his neighbor, was worthy of being respected.

 

He tried the second pair first, and afterwards the third pair of shoes, both fit him perfectly. He saw the images that appeared. Those two pairs were the lives of two different people he knew. People who he always criticized most of the time.  One was the life of the secretary of her boss. He always criticized her for the way she looked, the way she acted, the way she spoke, he always judged her because she was a very reserved and quiet girl, who looked like a nun. It turns out that this girl has suffered abuse from his father when she was a child, and she has been afraid of men ever since.

 

The third pair of shoes was the life of his father. He has always been very critic with him. His father was always a strict, cold and distant man. He didn’t know much about his father’s life, they never really had a relationship, and they haven’t talked in the last years. He always criticized his father for not being a good, loving and understanding father. But what he saw in those images broke his heart into pieces.

 

It turned out that his father has had a rough life. His grandfather, his father’s dad, was very severe with his son. He has been the only son out of 4 daughters, and his father was very hard on him, always receiving psychological and physical abuse from his part. “This will make you a man, and you are the only one, you must take care of your sisters”, he used to say. This man now understood that his father was the way he was because of his own father. He saw in the images that his father always took care of his 4 sisters after their father’s death, and he always took care of him. The man felt ashamed of himself for being so cruel with his father, because he was always distant and cold, but deep inside him he was good man. A father to be proud of.

 

The man feeling a mixed of emotions tried to find again an exit door, he also went to the front to see if he could open the door, but it was still locked. Tired and hopeless, he went back to the rear of the store. He realized that he hasn’t tried the fourth pair of shoes. Already feeling devastated he was afraid of what he could see in those last pair of shoes. His curiosity was stronger so he decided to try them on.

 

He started seeing the images passing through his eyes. Immediately he recognized the person in those images: It was himself, and those were his memories. He saw the person he was and he saw the person he has become. A selfish and judgmental person that has always been criticizing people without even knowing them. He started crying, he couldn’t recognize himself. “Who have I become?” He said with tears in his eyes. The images keep passing before his eyes. He couldn’t tolerate seeing himself in those images. He felt ashamed, and for a moment he even despised himself. “Please God I don’t want to be this person anymore, I can be better than this, I can change.” He cried out loud.

 

Suddenly, the images stopped. He took out the shoes. The lights went on, and he went to the front door. It was open. He went out the door and left the shop. He opened his eyes, he was lying on his bed, it was all a dream, a dream that came true. He wanted to change, God gave him hand. He reborn, he changed, he evolved, and his life was never the same again.

 

 

 

“Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle.” – John Watson

 

 

 

With this little story that I imagined in my mind, I could understand how different everything is when we get to know the story of a person. Once we know what they have been through, once we feel what they felt, everything changes. But do we need to go through that to be understanding and compassionate? The answer is no. We need to understand that everyone is fighting their own battler, becoming more understanding and less judgmental. We do not change people by criticizing them, nor we change our lives. We need less critics, and more people willing to become the best version of themselves so they can be ready to help others do the same. Together we can make this world a better place, it all starts with us and with the person we choose to be every single day of our lives.

 

 

 

 

The next time you criticize and judge others, try to put yourself in that person shoes first. Try to understand others as you would like them to understand you. Understanding is the key to a better world. Will you help create it?

A Short Story About the Power of Understanding

When it comes to criticize and judge others, we are all experts. Without mercy we go through life like judges criticizing and condemning others, but what would happen if we could spend the same energy we spend on judging others, in trying to understand them? Could it be possible that our understanding could change the way we see others? What if we would have the chance to walk in someone else’s shoes?

 

 

"Everything that irritates us about others can lead us to an understanding of ourselves." - Carl Jung

 

 

A few days ago, in one of those beautiful summer nights where the sky is clear and full of stars, and the temperature is pleasant, I was quietly sitting on an armchair in my balcony gazing at the stars. For some reason, every time I look at the sky I start to reflect about a certain topic, as if there were something up there, probably God, watching me and whispering something to me. In that night I started wondering about how much people tended to criticize others. I think because we can’t cope with our own life, we tend to focus on others rather than ourselves to feel less miserable.

While I was thinking about it I imagined how would it be to walk in someone else’s shoes. How would it be for one moment be in someone else’s skin and see life through that person’s eyes, and feel what that person feels. I was thinking that probably would increase our understanding for others, and we would become less judgmental. Our hearts would open, and we would change the way we treat others, becoming more understanding and compassionate, having more empathy and being less ruthless judges.

 

 

 

“Any fool can criticize, condemn, and complain but it takes character and self-control to be understanding and forgiving.” – Dale Carnegie

 

 

 

I always try to find examples that will help me clear my concerns. It is so that I imagined a little story about a man of about 30 years who used to criticize others constantly. It didn’t matter if you didn’t have reasons to criticize someone, this man always found a reason to criticize someone. Day and night, he was always criticizing and gossiping about other people, and no matter how annoying and despicable he was, he will always find followers who will applaud him.

One day, he went to a near shoe repair shop to collect one of the shoes he had left for repair. He entered into the shop, and suddenly a strong wind closed the door abruptly. He rang the bell, which was over the counter, to call the cobbler. No signs of him, he rang it one more time. He waited a few more minutes and decided to leave the store. He tried to open the door, but it was locked. “Maybe it was because of the wind” he thought. Tried a few more times without success.

“How will I get out? Maybe there is an alternative exit at the rear of the store” he thought. He went there to find a way to get out, and maybe he could also find the cobbler. As he was walking through the alley behind the counter the light slowly started to fade. Suddenly it was so dark he couldn’t see a thing. He was trying to find the light switch when something bright started shining. He went to see what it was, and he found four pair of shoes shining like stars.

He was amazed, he has never seen something like it. He took one of the shoes to see it closer, they were common shoes, but the light that shine through them with no apparently reason made them special. After seeing it carefully, he started using it as a lantern. He searched all around the place for the cobbler and the exit door. There were none of them. He searched every corner of that room, but there where no way out.

He decided to sit down and wait. “Maybe the cobbler went out to do something and he forgot to close the door, probably he will return soon” he thought. He waited half an hour, one hour, the cobbler never came. He was tired, hungry, and bored as hell. Where could he be? The man wondered. He took one of the shining shoes and tried it on, it was his size. He tried the other one. He stood up, and in that moment a miracle happened.

 

 

To be continued… 🙂 

Kindness: The Universal Language of Love

What if I tell you that there is a way to understand each other regardless our nationality? What if I tell you that there is a language that everyone already knows that we can use to speak to each other? What if I tell you that there is a language that can bring us love and heal our hearts? Would you believe me? Well, that language actually exists, is the universal language of love, and it is called kindness, and it can change the way we live our lives.

 

 “Kindness is a language which the deaf can hear and the blind can see.” - Mark Twain

 

 

We live in a world where its inhabitants are every day more connected through devices but every day more disconnected as human beings. We have all the resources to stay connected, to be together, but still, we insist on separate ourselves from each other. The real problem is that we cannot understand or comprehend each other. The reason? Simple: In the midst of the chaos of our society we have lost ourselves, and we have forgotten who we really are: kind, compassionate and loving beings.

There are thousands of different language in the world, but still, we cannot understand each other. You may be thinking that the problem is that we do not share the same language, but the problem is not that there are many different languages, the real problem is that we do not know, that we all speak the same language, and that language is kindness.

 

 

 

“A single act of kindness throws out roots in all directions, and the roots spring up and make new trees.” – Amelia Earhart

 

 

 

But kindness, a language? Yes, and let me tell you why. A language is a way of communication, which can be expressed in many ways. Therefore, we can say that kindness is a way to express love. Every simple word or act of kindness is a way to demonstrate love to another. Kindness is something that everyone can understand regardless culture, age, nationality or race. It is a language that can be spoken in many ways, and always will be heard.

The problem is that every day we are contaminated with other less important things in our daily routine, that we forget who we are, that is why we forget to speak the language of kindness. We underestimate the power of a simple word or act of kindness. The truth is that kindness speaks louder than any other language in the world, and it has the power to heal hearts, and bring joy and happiness to the person who speaks it, and the person who is ready to listen to it.

 

 

 

“Love and kindness are never wasted. They always make a difference. They bless the one who receives them, and they bless you, the giver.” – Barbara de Angelis

 

 

 

We can feel the power of kindness at any moment, for example: How do you feel when someone is kind to you? How do you feel when a stranger, someone you have never seen before, for no apparent reason, gives you a kind smile, or say a kind word? I guess you feel great, isn’t it? Even if it is for a second, a simple act or word of kindness has the power to fill our hearts with joy. Anytime, anywhere, with whomever we are, every act of kindness is never wasted.

Every time we are kind to someone else, even if we feel that the other person doesn’t care, deep inside their hearts they care, because the language of kindness is something that penetrates any barriers we can have, and gets deep inside our hearts, filling it with love and happiness.

 

 

 

“If we all do one random act of kindness daily; we just might set the world in the right direction.” – Martin Kornfeld

 

 

 

Kindness can be expressed even without words, that is why anyone can understand it, because a simple act, a simple touch, a simple smile, can speak louder than words. It doesn’t matter where we are from, nor our age, culture, gender, language, it doesn’t matter if we are deaf or blind, if we do not know how to read or write, because the language of kindness will always be understood. The kindness we give is a gift for others and a gift for ourselves, and the ripples it creates are bigger than we can imagine.

 

 

 

Why don’t you try to make one act of kindness a day, for a week, and see for yourself how wonderful it is? It is time to make kindness our first language, and change the way we live!

Our Example: Our Legacy

It is known that words are the most basic and simple form of giving a message because the most powerful message is given by our example, and through it we can change everything for better or worse. Our example is our legacy, it makes the real difference in our world, therefore, what example are you going to give?

 

"Be the change you wish to see in the world." - Mahatma Gandhi #example #bethechange

 

An example knows no boundaries and knows no languages, it is the most powerful source of knowledge and education. It is through our example that we give the kind of message that will last in people’s minds. A person can take that example, and follow it or they can avoid them, and do the opposite, it is their decision, but is your responsibility to be the example you would like to see in them and in the world.

Day after day, we go through life complaining about the behaviours of others, we constantly criticize and judge others but we never look ourselves in the mirror. The truth is if we tried to be the example of person we would like to see in the world, every human being on this planet would be different, but the problem is we are more focused in changing others than changing ourselves in the first place, and the result is many critics, but few people who actually do something to change the world they live in.

 

 

“Setting an example is not the main means of influencing others; it is the only means.” – Albert Einstein

 

 

 

How can we pretend others act in the way we would like them to act if we are not capable of acting in the way we would like them to act? To make it simpler: How other people will act in a different way if you behave exactly as them? Your example is their example, and their example is your example, everything is connected. The funny thing is that we all consider ourselves as the preachers of truth, values, honesty, love, and morality, and so we go through life, teaching and preaching to others and judging and condemning them for their behaviours but we never stop and reflect about our own behaviours, because if we did that, we would realize how far is our example of being the kind of example we are always talking about.

Parents that fight in front of their children, parents who are dishonest between each other, parents who have bad habits, parents that are aggressive and disrespectful with their children, how can they pretend their kids to not be like them? Just saying things like do not do that, do not say that, do not behave like that? Of course not! They will have to be the example of person that they would like their children to be. Well the same happens everywhere. In churches, in schools, in universities, in work places, in politics, and in every single place of this world there have been people whose examples have helped to make this world a complete nightmare and at the same time there are people who their examples have helped to make this world a better place.

 

 

 

“People may doubt what you say, but they will believe what you do.” – Lewis Cass

 

 

The questions we should analyse now are: What example, that is to say, what message are we giving to the world? Are we being an example of love, kindness, compassion, honesty, respect and understanding or are we being an example of the opposite? Are we being the change we would like to see in the world or are we being the creators of our own destruction? What kind of example are we giving? What legacy are we leaving?

We have to learn something: Our criticism does not lead us anywhere, it does not change anything, but it is our good example what can change the whole world and if it cannot change the world at least will contribute to make this world a better place, and at least one person around you will learn from your example and it will adopt it as their own, and if we all do that, imagine what would happen. This world would definitely be what it was intended to be: A heaven on earth. Be an example not by being perfect, but just being the best version of yourself in every situation you can.

 

 

 

Do you want a better world? Fantastic! Now your first responsibility is to be the change you want to see in the world. Be an example to follow for those around you, for those you know and do not know, for those you love and those who don’t, for your friends and your enemies, this will be your legacy for the born and unborn. Be the source of love, values, kindness and loyalty and see how the world changes!

The Pursuit Of Happiness

Every human being on this earth has the same desire: to be happy. Happiness is a wish we all have in common, every human on this planet want to be happy, and everyone wishes to find eternal happiness but, what is it? Is it real? And if it does, how can be achieved?

 "Happiness is the meaning and the purpose of life, the whole aim and end of human existence." - Aristotle

Understanding Happiness

 

I have always believed in happiness, but I have never been able to experience a long-lasting happiness but only for a short period of time until I found out the true meaning of it, what gave me the clue where to look for it. The problem was that I always looked for it in a place outside of me, and this was because I had the wrong idea of what happiness really meant and where can one find it.

In my pursuit of happiness I have always asked myself different questions: What is it? Is it real? Where can I find it? Is happiness a destination? Is it a place where one can get and stay there forever? Can I find a long-lasting happiness? Is it possible to be truly happy or is it just a creation of human imagination? These are some of the questions I have always asked myself trying to find out the definition of happiness and what I realized is that my concepts about it were completely wrong.

 

 

 

“Happiness is a journey, not a destination; happiness is to be found along the way not at the end of the road, for then the journey is over and it’s too late. The time for happiness is today not tomorrow.” – Paul H. Dunn

 

 

 

According to the dictionary: happiness is the state of being happy, and to be happy means, to be delighted or glad over a particular thing. However, people have given different meanings to happiness, what can be happiness for some people are sorrow for others. According to how we see the world, and what are our beliefs about life, it is what will form our definition of happiness. Thus, it is very complicated to define it in one particular way, as it is something that has as meanings as people on this planet.

Therefore, does happiness exist? In my opinion, according to my life experience, I believe it is something that truly exists, making it possible to achieve it. The problem with most of us is that our happiness disappears in the blink of an eye, sometimes it disappears even before we can truly enjoy being happy. For instance, when we go on holidays and our happiness is growing every second, and suddenly, in the right moment when we are reaching that moment of absolute bliss, our happiness is snatched from us for our daily routine. Our happiness is always so short that we distrust its existence and this is due to our confused ideas of what it really means.

 

 

 

“Happiness cannot be traveled to, owned, earned, worn or consumed. Happiness is the spiritual experience of living every minute with love, grace, and gratitude.” – Denis Waitley

 

 

 

Then, to understand more about it, let’s try to ask different questions and think about it, because as Claude Levi-Strauss said: “The wise man doesn’t give the right answers, he poses the right questions.”

I already expressed my opinion about the existence of happiness so, what is it? Where can we find it? Does it depends on life circumstances? Can happiness be something constant or it will always be interrupted? Is it based in our actions? Do we need to get something special or get to a particular place to experiment happiness? Does our past or our future influence our present happiness? Can an external factor affect our happiness?

What comes to your mind when you think about these questions? Why are you happy when you say you are happy? What is it that makes you feel happiness? And why are you sad when you say you are sad? Have you thought about it? Sometimes, it is in our own questions where we find the answers.

 

 

The key to being happy lies in understanding happiness. In my next post I will go deeply into the meaning of it. Until next time my friends!