Tag Archives: pain

The Battle Between Us and Our Past

Sometimes in a person’s life, a battle takes place between him and his past. This battle occurs in that person’s present. The past controls and conditions its present, and the person becomes the victim of its past, and his whole life is covered with suffering. But is the past the true cause of suffering? If this battle is real, how can we win?

 

 

the-secret-of-change-is-to-focus-all-of-your-energy-not-on-fighting-the-old-but-on-building-the-new-dan-millman

 

 

Imagine with me for a moment that we are witnessing a trial, a fictional trial. Today the court is going to dictate the sentence. The victim is a woman, and the defendant its past. The woman accused it for destroying her life. According to her, everything that happened to her and every person involved in her past have caused a permanent damage in her life. She expressed that her present has been conditioned by the things that happened or didn’t happened and by the persons that caused them. She claimed that her past is the first and only cause of all suffering she experiences in her present.

The trial takes place, and after several hours of debate, it is time for the verdict. After reviewing the case very carefully, the court makes a decision. The defendant is exonerated from all charges and the victim is found guilty and it is convicted to a life in prison, with the exemption that she will not be behind the bars, but she will be attached to the defendant, her past, for the rest of her life. Having a life of misery and despair.

 

 

 

 

“Too often, we carry around those things from our past that hurt us the most. Don’t let past pain rob you of your present happiness. You had to live through it in the past, and that cannot be changed, but if the only place it lives today is in your mind, then forgive, let go, and be free.” – Doe Zantamata

 

 

 

 

In this trial, the past is accused of causing suffering and permanent damage in this woman’s present. Then, why it is exonerated from all charges? How come the victim is declared guilty and the accused innocent? Because they are not judging situations, experiences and people of her past, they are judging it for causing pain in her present, and for the court the only cause of suffering of this woman in her present is herself, for the past itself can’t cause suffering in a place where it doesn’t exist, and it cease to exist in the present, the only one who can keep the past alive in the present is oneself in one’s mind, therefore, if we remain attached to it in our present, we are guilty of our present suffering.

When we become victims of our past, we immediately condemn ourselves to a life in prison. When we refuse to let it go by remaining attached to it, we take the role of victims, and in the end, the only thing we get is more and more suffering. The truth is, we cannot change what happened, no matter how painful it might have been, but we can change our present. We can decide to let go of the past, quitting the role of victims, and releasing ourselves from the hard sentence.

 

 

 

“Today is a new day. Don’t let your history interfere with your destiny! Let today be the day you stop being a victim of your circumstances and start taking action towards the life you want. You have the power and the time to shape your life. Break free from the poisonous victim mentality and embrace the truth of your greatness. You were not meant for a mundane or mediocre life!” – Steve Maraboli

 

 

 

 

Our past may have been our worst nightmare, we may have suffered, things in our past may have damaged us, people may have hurt us, and we can have all the right to feel victims, but by being a victim with all our resentment and hate we are not going to change what happened, nor we are going to feel better, but slowly and painfully those feelings will consume our own souls. Our past might never be of our liking, and maybe we will never overcome all the things that happened to us, but if we do not cease to be its victims, if we do not let it go, we will carry it as a burden in our backs, condemning ourselves to a life of misery.

It is a hard battle the one that is carried out between you and your past, but the victory is possible. To obtain it, to finally defeat it, there is a few things you need to do, but the first thing is to stop fighting with it. Let it go, accept it, forgive, let go of resentment, learn, those are useful things you can do to cease with your suffering. End this useless battle, and take back the control of your feelings, emotions and your entire life.

 

 

 

 

 

Stop being a victim of your past, letting it go, cutting all attachments to it, cleansing your body, soul and mind from all resentment, and starting again, only then you will heal your heart, end with all suffering and you will become free to start a new life!

Release the pain and heal your heart

There are different moments in our lives where we are going to feel pain, it can be a superficial pain or a deeper pain, sometimes it can be for seconds, for hours, months or even years, and sometimes it never goes away, getting trapped in our hearts, contaminating our soul, and breaking our hearts, and the only way to stop it from hurting us is to release it from our hearts, letting it go away from our lives.

 "Find a place inside where there's joy, and the joy will burn out the pain." - Joseph Campbell

 

There are three different kind of people: The ones that swallow the pain, digest it and throw it away from their mind and heart, the ones that swallow it, keeping it inside, letting it to destroy its heart, becoming its victim, and the ones that swallow it and let it spread through its veins like poison, contaminating its heart, becoming a reflection of its pain.

The first kind of people are not exempt of feeling pain, in fact it is very possible that they have felt it many times in their past, and they will probably feel it in their future, but what makes the difference between the other two type of people is that these people do not let it to control their lives. Therefore, once they feel it they find a way to remove it from their hearts as soon as possible.

 

 

 

“Bad things do happen; how I respond to them defines my character and the quality of my life. I can choose to sit in perpetual sadness, immobilized by the gravity of my loss, or I can choose to rise from the pain and treasure the most precious gift I have – life itself.” – Walter Anderson

 

 

 

 

The second kind of people are the ones that feel pain but are not able to release it from their hearts, keeping it deep inside their hearts. The problem with doing this is that while they can have a smile in their faces, deep inside their hearts the pain kills them. These people do not release it in any way, but they keep it from themselves. The problem is that they become prisoners of it, destroying them inside day after day, and sometimes that pain becomes so intolerable that the person surrenders to it.

The third kind of people are almost the same as the second kind of people but there is one big difference between them. The main difference is that these people try to release it and stop their suffering by hurting others. The problem is that the pain they are feeling has consumed their hearts, and poisoned their minds. They are so destroyed inside that the only way they can rebel before so much pain is by becoming the definition of it themselves, causing others to feel it in order to heal themselves.

 

 

 

“These pains you feel are messengers. Listen to them.” – Rumi 

 

 

 

As we can see pain is something that we must let go of from our hearts before it destroys the person we really are. It is not always possible to avoid feeling it, in fact, we should not force ourselves to not feel it, we must embrace it, taste it, digest it, learn from it and once we are ready we must let it go.

How do we release it then? Well, the answer will depend on the pain and the person, but the best way is knowing that the feeling of pain will not erase the fact that caused it in the first place. Therefore, we must focus in something else, something that makes us feel good, and we have to be patient and give ourselves time, knowing that sooner or later that pain will go away. Pain will bring us more pain and never joy, it won’t change what happened to us nor will change our future, it depends on us whether let it to destroy us, or destroy it ourselves.

 

 

 

My focus is to forget the pain of life. Forget the pain, mock the pain, reduce it and laugh.” – Jim Carrey

 

 

 

We can be the victims of our pain and let it control our lives, or we can be the creator of our own destiny. In the first option we will be at mercy of our pain, and in the second option we’ll decide what to do with our own lives. It won’t be easy, but it is possible. We cannot always avoid to feel pain, but we can always decide what we do with it. Transform it into something beautiful and you will change your world.

 

 

 

Today is the day where you can release the pain you are feeling, it is now the moment to decide to let it go, and start a new life!