Tag Archives: Motivation

Don’t Take Anything Personally

Day after day we deliberately accept in our minds the venom of poisonous people with devastating consequences. Once in our minds, this venom annihilates our self-confidence and destroys our self-esteem and feelings of anger, hatred and resentment flood our minds. Cause: taking things too personally. Cure: living without the influence of other people’s opinions.  Are you taking things personally? Are you letting other people’s opinion and behaviors define your true self?

 

 

Don’t take anything personally, nothing others do is because of you. What others say and do is a projection of their own reality, their own dream. When you are immune to the opinions and actions of others, you won’t be the victim of needless suffering. Don Miguel Ruiz

 

 

 

We go through life as we had a target hanging from our necks. We feel as if we were inoffensive deer grazing peacefully in the woods surrounded by heartless hunters waiting for the perfect moment to pull the trigger. Suddenly, that moment comes, the world freezes, the watch stops, and bang! Perfect shot, straight into our heads, we lie motionless, presumed deceased. The world begins to move again, we breathe, we are alive, we survived, but the scars are bleeding, the pain increases, and suddenly the pain becomes anger and the anger commence to rule our lives. Resentment becomes our ally.

The problem is that our constantly need for acceptance and our desperate search for everyone’s approval has become a necessity in order to maintain an acceptable reputation to society, and this reputation, or our own reputation about our own selves is severely affected when we encounter ourselves being the target of someone’s attacks, that is the main reason why we take things so personally, because that person is preventing us from achieving our goal of being accepted by every single human in our society. It damages our ego, diminishes our self-confidence and put ourselves at the edge of collapse.

 

 

“What other people think of you is not your business. If you start to make that business your business, you will be offended for the rest of your life.” – Deepak Chopra

 

 

Therefore, taking things personally and unhappiness are connected. But, is there such thing as an everlasting happiness? Well, There are many keys and ideas of how can one be happy, but this question continues to be an existential doubt for most of us. However, through the years we have discovered important keys to unhappiness. One of them is taking things personally, when we do this, we expose ourselves, we put ourselves in a place of extreme vulnerability, putting our own happiness in someone else’s hands. When we take things personally, we condemn ourselves to a life of misery and resentment, we sabotage our own capabilities of achieving all our dreams and goals, and we deny ourselves the possibility of having a happy life.

When someone attacks you in any way in the end they never have something personal with you but rather they have something personal with themselves. The only time when you can take things personally is when you have attacked them or hurt them in any way first. For example, let’s imagine the case where you insult someone else’s mother, if the person gives you a punch in the face, you can take it personally, nevertheless, in the end, it always comes down to the fact that someone’s reaction and behavior against others is never something personal with them but with their own selves, no matter if they think they have an excuse for acting that way.

 

 

“There is a huge amount of freedom that comes to you when you take nothing personally.” — Miguel Ruiz.

 

 

Not taking things personally from the people that surrounds you is not something we can learn overnight, but is rather an every day commitment, but there is nothing more rewarding that gaining that level of freedom and become immune to other people’s opinions, immune to other people’s criticism, immune to other people’s judgements, immune to other people’s aggression. The real truth is that other people’s behaviors and attitudes toward you do not define nor categorize you, not damage your reputation, do not condemn you, but they rather do all of that onto them. Every actions and behaviors, every thoughts and opinions of others are only a reflection of their own souls, they do not indicate who you are, but they indicate who they are. Therefore, do not take things personally, and you will have found the key to your own personal development, you will broaden your limitations and you will declare, loudly and fearless to the world:  “I do not seek to belong, I do not seek to be accepted, nobody defines me nor limits me, I am immune to the poisonous souls that seek to destroy me, I am an utterly and completely free soul.”

 

 

 

 

Learn to not take things personally, release your soul from the need to get everyone’s approval and become immune to other people’s criticism, opinions and behaviors and you will have discovered one of the keys to success and your personal development. 

Is Life a Competition?

Since we were children we are taught to compete. Day after day the habit of competing with others is shaped. When we less expect it that habit is created, and our whole life becomes a competition, a competition where we need to beat others in order to be successful. But is life really a competition? Do we need to compete in order to be successful? It is the act of competing with others what give us true victory? Can the result of a competition really define a human being? Let’s find out together more about competition, its definition, level of importance and impact on human beings.

 

 

 

 

According to the dictionary, a competition is “a situation in which someone is trying to win something or be more successful than someone else” In other words, we can define competition as being an opportunity to get a special prize that might have a special significance, or the opportunity to defeat others to declare oneself as being more successful or superior than someone else. Therefore, does this mean that we must focus on defeating others to be successful? It is by doing so, that one truly achieves victory? It is true that through competing with others one evolves, becomes superior, and achieves greatness?

Well, that will depend on the way we see it, that is to say, our own perspective, belief and idea of what a competition truly means. Two different beliefs are going to determine the true meaning of competition and the answers to those questions: 1. The belief that life is a competition, where you have to defeat others in every possible aspect of your life. 2. The belief that life is not a competition at all, and if there is one competition that is with the person you were yesterday.

 

 

 

“The only competition worthy of a wise man is with himself.” – Washington Allston

 

 

 

The first belief will define competition as the possibility to beat others to be successful, believing that through defeating others one gets true victory, what makes them more superior, what makes them evolve, and so achieve greatness.  The second belief will define competition as being merely the chance to be better than you were yesterday, believing that one is successful, evolves and achieves greatness by becoming the best version of oneself.

The people who have the first belief will focus on winning others. That will be their maximum goal, beating others will become their main desire, and the defeat of others will be their victory.  Those who have the second belief will focus on being better than they were yesterday, and becoming the best version of themselves will be their ultimate goal, and victory for them will mean being the person they were meant to be without needing to defeat others for being so.

 

 

 

“You are never really playing an opponent. You are playing yourself, your own highest standards, and when you reach your limits, that is real joy.” – Arthur Ashe

 

 

 

As we can see competition is a word that can have many different meanings. The true is that nowadays people have accepted the first belief, because that is what this society taught us. It taught us that we need to compete, and in every competition, we have to win others in order to be successful. And this is not about sports, this is not a simple game, this is about life. Somehow, they transformed life into a competition. We compete not to become the best version of ourselves, but to simply defeat others, what gave us a wrong idea of life.

Every aspect of our life has become a competition. In every place there is an ongoing competition: In workplaces, schools, universities, homes, neighborhoods, bars, parks, and every corner of this world. We compete to see who has the best car, smartphone, house, clothes, shoes, we compete to see who has the best body, who looks better, who is more beautiful, we compete to see who has the best job, the best position, the best salary, we compete to see who has the best grades, or the most important degree, or anything that will put us in a “high status position”,  we compete to see who has the best birthday, wedding, funeral, it doesn’t matter, the fact is that we have to be better than others, that gives a fake sensation of happiness and success, that seems to fill our empty souls.

 

 

 

“Real learning comes about when the competitive spirit has ceased.” – Jiddu Krishnamurti

 

 

 

But, do we ever feel complete? No, not really, and that is why we never stop competing. We desperate need to be better than others to feel successful. What we don’t know is that the only person we need to be better than is the person we were yesterday. Being the person we were meant to be, doing the things we love without needing others approval, without needing to beat others, gives us freedom, and that makes us truly successful, that is how you really win this competition called “Life”, which in fact is not a competition at all, or not against others, but a competition against the person we were yesterday. Winning this game, means defeating the person that we are not, becoming the person that we really are, and that means becoming the best version of ourselves.

If you want to improve yourself, to develop your true potential, if you want to succeed at life, you will have to fight to become the person you are capable of becoming, if you believe in yourself and you think you are good enough to be the person you have imagined, then there is no need to compete with others, because you will realize that you don’t have competition, and if you don’t have competition, against whom are you going to compete with?

 

 

 

 

 

Life is not a competition, and if there is one competition, that is against ourselves. We create our own success by exceeding our own standards not by defeating others. So let’s go out and become the best version of ourselves!

Improve your Strategies for Better Outcomes

Some of the circumstances that happen in our life are inevitable, some of them are simply a matter of luck, and some of them are the product of our actions. Our life is not already written, but it is easy to think it is, because that way we disclaim ourselves from any responsibility and we blame destiny for being the cause of our hardships. The truth is we create our life with our own actions, and if the outcomes we are getting are not the desired ones, it is time to improve our life strategies.

 

 "If you do what you've always done, you'll get what you've always gotten." - Anthony Robins better outcomes

 

 

If we keep thinking the same thoughts, if keep having the same feelings, if we keep making the same actions and having the same behaviors, we are going to keep getting what we have always got. The question now is: Are you getting the outcomes you expect to get? If the answer is yes, congratulations! You’re heading in the right direction! If the answer is no, you will need to change your strategies, and do something in a different way until you get the desired outcomes.

If we are not getting what we want is probably because something is not working as it should, something we are doing is not helping us to get the outcomes we expect. Normally we blame life, our family, time, money, or anything we can put our blame on for not getting the outcomes we want, but the truth is, in most cases we are the cause of our own failure. Therefore, if we want better outcomes, if we want to succeed we will have to change something in order to be successful, and stop doing the kind of things that has only gave us failure.

 

 

 

“Achieve success in any area of life by identifying the optimum strategies and repeating them until they become habits.” – Charles J. Givens

 

 

 

The first and most important thing we should know in order to succeed is to know that we do not depend on our environment to succeed, but in having the ability to not fall in the trap of remaining captive in that environment. That is to say, no matter where we are right now, and which our external circumstances, we can always create a better tomorrow, and the key to do that is not to surrender to our current circumstances, and take responsibility for our own life, and create with our own actions the life we truly want to experience, and take all the right actions in order to get the desired outcomes.

If you want something different, if you want a better outcome for your life you need to change your current actions and improve your strategies. What are you doing now that is giving you results? What are you doing that is not giving you the outcomes you want? What are you not doing that can help you get the outcomes you desire? What kind of strategies have you been using that haven’t given you the outcomes you expected? What can you do today to improve them? Think about those questions, determine what you want, and discover what you can do that will help you get the outcomes you want. Read, ask, learn, make mistakes, take risks, try once more, improve, improve and improve until you are successful, but never give up!

 

 

 

“The first step toward success is taken when you refuse to be a captive of the environment in which you first find yourself.” – Mark Caine

 

 

 

There is always something you can do better, there is always something that you can improve, do not limit yourself by thinking that is nothing else you can do, or that you can’t aspire for more, you have greatness within you, and you can achieve anything if you work hard, if you are persevering, and if you never surrender to any hardship. You can always grow, learn, improve, evolve and succeed. Learn from past mistakes, learn from other people’s mistakes, ask questions, learn new things, improve yourself, develop your potential, and do not stop until you get the outcomes you want to get.

 

 

 

 

If what you have been thinking, feeling and doing has not given you the outcomes you wish to get, it is time to improve your strategies. Do not be afraid to change, do not be afraid to try something new, do not be afraid of failure, remember that failure is only real when you give up! Change your strategies, and get the outcomes you want!

Your Future Starts Today!

The actions we take today are the foundations of our future. We create our own future, that is to say, we reap what we sow. We are the architects of our own life, and the future that awaits us, is the future we are creating now. Therefore, in order to have the life we have imagined, there is something we need to remember: Our future starts today!

 

 "The best way to predict your future is to create it." - Abraham Lincoln

 

 

The reality is that none of us know what is going to happen in our future, but the actions we take in our present can give us an idea of how our future is going to look like. It is simple as that, what we do today or what we cease to do has a consequence in our life. We create with every action we take our future, therefore, it depends on us to create today what we want to experience tomorrow.

Normally we get surprised when life suddenly punches us in our face with the truth. The truth about that life has gone quickly and our reality is far from being the one that we have ever dreamed of. That is the moment when we ask ourselves – What have I done all my life? How can I be in this situation now when I wanted something different for my life? What has gone wrong? Well my friend, you have been very busy doing something else rather than being focused in creating the life you have always imagined

 

 

 

“The past, the present and the future are really one: they are today.” – Harriet Beecher Stowe

 

 

 

The problem is that we see our future as something distant to us, but is not. Life goes quickly, very quickly, and if we are not careful we could end up living a life that is far from the one in our dreams. To avoid that, we have to focus in the life that we want, and take the right actions in order to create it, and we have to start today, not tomorrow, not the day after tomorrow, but today. The problem is that we usually leave everything for tomorrow, because we do not realize how close our future is, but in fact it starts today, and with every little action we are creating our own destiny.

Everything that you want to achieve in your future requires you to take a certain action in your present. It might be tough, hard and unpleasant, but if you really want to get to the place where you want to get, you will have to take those necessary actions in order to triumph. Our future is unknown, but we can do everything we can in order to create the life that we want, or we can leave everything to chance and see what happens.

 

 

 

“The future depends on what you do today.” – Mahatma Gandhi

 

 

 

Do you want to get that degree you really want and become the person you imagine? Well, start today, study, work hard and create today the person you want to become. Do you want to be successful? Do not act as a loser expecting one day to become successful. Be successful now, make the actions that will make you a successful person. Do you want to have your own business? Perfect! Work hard today and take all the necessary actions until you make it a reality. If you want something tomorrow, you will have to make something today that will push you closer to what you want. It is what you do today what defines your future.

What I’m saying here is that you shouldn’t worry about your future, I mean, if you are creating the life that you want, why worry then? We have to live in the present knowing that our future starts today. Focus your mind in the present moment, enjoy every single minute of your life, but at the same time create today the life you would like to experience tomorrow. Don’t gamble with your life, don’t let everything to chance, don’t create today a life from which you will regret in your future.

 

 

 

“Yesterday is gone. Tomorrow has not yet come. We have only today. Let us begin.” – Mother Teresa

 

 

 

What you are doing today is leading you to the place where you want to get or are you merely drifting? What you are doing today is helping you to achieve what you really want? Be honest with yourself and answer this question – Are you working in your goals and dreams or are you too busy doing less important things? It’s a yes or no question. Answers like “sometimes”, “maybe”, “I don’t have time”, “I don’t have money” are not allowed. If the answer is yes – Congratulations! Keep moving forward! But if the answer is no, you can either continue like that and see what your future holds, or you can start by creating the future you want now with no excuses, no delays, no distractions.

 

 

 

 

Life is like the book “Choose your own story”, you are writing your own book, and you create your own ending by the decisions you take and actions you make. Life can be sometimes unpredictable and some circumstances are unavoidable, but we are the creators of the major part of our lives. Choose to create now the future you dream!

What motivates me?

There is one simple question we must ask ourselves: What motivates me?, once you find the answer to that question, you will find the reason of your existence, so you will finally know why are you here and what is your mission on this planet.

 Motivation is the key to success

I really believe that every human on earth is here for a reason, the trick is to find it. The best way to know what is our purpose in this life is by knowing what really motivates us. Motivation is what causes us to act in a specific way at a particular time and can be influenced by different factors that can be internal or external, so our motivations will determine our behaviors, and our behaviors will determine our future.

What is really important is that we must find what really motivates us to do something, because if those motivations are based in obligations created by external factors, we will feel frustrated even if we have achieved the goals imposed by those factors. And the reason why we feel frustrated is because we haven’t fulfilled our most desired goals, because we have allowed fear to interfere with our dreams, and when we do that, we let fear be our motivation, so we act according to our fears, letting them to control us, what makes us to go in the opposite direction of our goals and dreams. The only way to avoid this is by believing that our dreams are bigger than any fear, so we will use fear as a motivation rather than using fear as an excuse.

“The two most important days in your life are the day you are born and the day you find out why.” – Mark Twain

We must find what really motivates us in our life and what really motivates us to live our life and not only to exist are those things based in our true self. Those motivations that have been influenced by our deepest desires are those who are going to make us to be the best version of ourselves so we can make our dreams a reality, and that is the only way to live a happy and fulfilled life.

The trick to find our true motivation in life is to listen to our heart, so you can know what you truly want to become, and once you know that, from now on your motivations will be based in your true desires, what will make you to act in a certain way at every moment to achieve those desires. Once you find what really motivates you, stick to it and never let it go, because that motivation will make you to do whatever you can to reach your goals, and you will transform what it was impossible into possible.

“To succeed, you need to find something to hold on to, something to motivate you, something to inspire you.” – Tony Dorsett

What I want you to understand is that you must find those things that motivates you to be the person you always wanted to be, and the only way to do that is to listen the call from your soul and follow your heart at any time. It’s not going to be easy but it’s going to be worth it, because there is nothing that can give us more happiness than doing what we came here to do. So every time you are doing something always ask yourself why? Why am I doing this? What motivates me? Are those motivations influenced by my deepest desires or are those motivations based in someone else’s dreams?

I truly believe that those in which their actions are based in their deepest desires are those who live life to the fullest, because I think nothing is impossible for those who find what really motivates them in their lives and follow their hearts every step of the way. Those people never give up against adversity, because their motivations are also influenced by fears and doubts, what makes them to keep going forward because their desires and dreams are greater that their fears. Those people are motivated by their biggest dreams and not only motivated by simple goals, and when your motivation is influenced by the need to realize your dreams, is when you reach your full potential, and you fulfill you deepest goals and desires.

Find what motivates you, because that is the spark that will ignite the engine that will push you forward in your life and what will make you be the greatest version of yourself, and all your dreams will be a reality and you will have a happy and fulfilled life.