Tag Archives: Judge

A Short Story About the Power of Understanding

When it comes to criticize and judge others, we are all experts. Without mercy we go through life like judges criticizing and condemning others, but what would happen if we could spend the same energy we spend on judging others, in trying to understand them? Could it be possible that our understanding could change the way we see others? What if we would have the chance to walk in someone else’s shoes?

 

 

"Everything that irritates us about others can lead us to an understanding of ourselves." - Carl Jung

 

 

A few days ago, in one of those beautiful summer nights where the sky is clear and full of stars, and the temperature is pleasant, I was quietly sitting on an armchair in my balcony gazing at the stars. For some reason, every time I look at the sky I start to reflect about a certain topic, as if there were something up there, probably God, watching me and whispering something to me. In that night I started wondering about how much people tended to criticize others. I think because we can’t cope with our own life, we tend to focus on others rather than ourselves to feel less miserable.

While I was thinking about it I imagined how would it be to walk in someone else’s shoes. How would it be for one moment be in someone else’s skin and see life through that person’s eyes, and feel what that person feels. I was thinking that probably would increase our understanding for others, and we would become less judgmental. Our hearts would open, and we would change the way we treat others, becoming more understanding and compassionate, having more empathy and being less ruthless judges.

 

 

 

“Any fool can criticize, condemn, and complain but it takes character and self-control to be understanding and forgiving.” – Dale Carnegie

 

 

 

I always try to find examples that will help me clear my concerns. It is so that I imagined a little story about a man of about 30 years who used to criticize others constantly. It didn’t matter if you didn’t have reasons to criticize someone, this man always found a reason to criticize someone. Day and night, he was always criticizing and gossiping about other people, and no matter how annoying and despicable he was, he will always find followers who will applaud him.

One day, he went to a near shoe repair shop to collect one of the shoes he had left for repair. He entered into the shop, and suddenly a strong wind closed the door abruptly. He rang the bell, which was over the counter, to call the cobbler. No signs of him, he rang it one more time. He waited a few more minutes and decided to leave the store. He tried to open the door, but it was locked. “Maybe it was because of the wind” he thought. Tried a few more times without success.

“How will I get out? Maybe there is an alternative exit at the rear of the store” he thought. He went there to find a way to get out, and maybe he could also find the cobbler. As he was walking through the alley behind the counter the light slowly started to fade. Suddenly it was so dark he couldn’t see a thing. He was trying to find the light switch when something bright started shining. He went to see what it was, and he found four pair of shoes shining like stars.

He was amazed, he has never seen something like it. He took one of the shoes to see it closer, they were common shoes, but the light that shine through them with no apparently reason made them special. After seeing it carefully, he started using it as a lantern. He searched all around the place for the cobbler and the exit door. There were none of them. He searched every corner of that room, but there where no way out.

He decided to sit down and wait. “Maybe the cobbler went out to do something and he forgot to close the door, probably he will return soon” he thought. He waited half an hour, one hour, the cobbler never came. He was tired, hungry, and bored as hell. Where could he be? The man wondered. He took one of the shining shoes and tried it on, it was his size. He tried the other one. He stood up, and in that moment a miracle happened.

 

 

To be continued… 🙂 

Our Example: Our Legacy

It is known that words are the most basic and simple form of giving a message because the most powerful message is given by our example, and through it we can change everything for better or worse. Our example is our legacy, it makes the real difference in our world, therefore, what example are you going to give?

 

"Be the change you wish to see in the world." - Mahatma Gandhi #example #bethechange

 

An example knows no boundaries and knows no languages, it is the most powerful source of knowledge and education. It is through our example that we give the kind of message that will last in people’s minds. A person can take that example, and follow it or they can avoid them, and do the opposite, it is their decision, but is your responsibility to be the example you would like to see in them and in the world.

Day after day, we go through life complaining about the behaviours of others, we constantly criticize and judge others but we never look ourselves in the mirror. The truth is if we tried to be the example of person we would like to see in the world, every human being on this planet would be different, but the problem is we are more focused in changing others than changing ourselves in the first place, and the result is many critics, but few people who actually do something to change the world they live in.

 

 

“Setting an example is not the main means of influencing others; it is the only means.” – Albert Einstein

 

 

 

How can we pretend others act in the way we would like them to act if we are not capable of acting in the way we would like them to act? To make it simpler: How other people will act in a different way if you behave exactly as them? Your example is their example, and their example is your example, everything is connected. The funny thing is that we all consider ourselves as the preachers of truth, values, honesty, love, and morality, and so we go through life, teaching and preaching to others and judging and condemning them for their behaviours but we never stop and reflect about our own behaviours, because if we did that, we would realize how far is our example of being the kind of example we are always talking about.

Parents that fight in front of their children, parents who are dishonest between each other, parents who have bad habits, parents that are aggressive and disrespectful with their children, how can they pretend their kids to not be like them? Just saying things like do not do that, do not say that, do not behave like that? Of course not! They will have to be the example of person that they would like their children to be. Well the same happens everywhere. In churches, in schools, in universities, in work places, in politics, and in every single place of this world there have been people whose examples have helped to make this world a complete nightmare and at the same time there are people who their examples have helped to make this world a better place.

 

 

 

“People may doubt what you say, but they will believe what you do.” – Lewis Cass

 

 

The questions we should analyse now are: What example, that is to say, what message are we giving to the world? Are we being an example of love, kindness, compassion, honesty, respect and understanding or are we being an example of the opposite? Are we being the change we would like to see in the world or are we being the creators of our own destruction? What kind of example are we giving? What legacy are we leaving?

We have to learn something: Our criticism does not lead us anywhere, it does not change anything, but it is our good example what can change the whole world and if it cannot change the world at least will contribute to make this world a better place, and at least one person around you will learn from your example and it will adopt it as their own, and if we all do that, imagine what would happen. This world would definitely be what it was intended to be: A heaven on earth. Be an example not by being perfect, but just being the best version of yourself in every situation you can.

 

 

 

Do you want a better world? Fantastic! Now your first responsibility is to be the change you want to see in the world. Be an example to follow for those around you, for those you know and do not know, for those you love and those who don’t, for your friends and your enemies, this will be your legacy for the born and unborn. Be the source of love, values, kindness and loyalty and see how the world changes!

Judge less, Love more

Judge less, Love more

 

The problem is we judge too much. We go through life judging everyone around us as if we were superior species from another galaxy whom they do everything well, and whom always make the best decisions. But the truth is that we are all humans and we all have the right to do whatever we want according to our own vision of life.

 

 

“Do not judge, or you too will be judged. For in the same way you judge others, you will be judged, and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you.” – Matthew 7:1-2

 

 

 

We waste so much time judging others than we forget to judge ourselves, and that is when the problem begins, because if we are going to judge, let’s judge ourselves first, and then we could see the reason why we act as we act every day, what will make us understand that everyone around us have also reasons deep inside their hearts to say the things they say and to act the way they act.

It’s easy for us to judge someone, what is hard for us is to put ourselves in someone else’s shoes. If we could do that, and if we could not only put ourselves in someone else’s shoes, but feel what that person is feeling deep inside their heart, I’m sure we would be surprised, and we will never judge a person again in our life.

 

 

“If you judge people, you have no time to love them.” – Mother Theresa

 

 

It’s easy for us to judge people all the time, it’s easy for us to judge people by the way they act, the way they speak, the way they think, the way they feel, the way they look, the way they dress, it’s easy for us to judge people for what they do and what they say and it’s easy for us to judge people through the decisions they make. And why is it so easy for us to judge? Because we don’t have an idea what another person has in its mind and heart and we are not even close to know how a person is feeling inside, because we can know the story of a person, but we can never feel what another person feels about something.

Judging others doesn’t make us better, but actually does the opposite, because we define ourselves every time we judge another person, and the act of judging others reflects how we feel about ourselves. Every time we judge, we express the lack of love for ourselves and for life, because it requires having in ourselves a lot of love, tolerance and compassion to not judge another person anymore, but understand them even when we disagree with them in all aspects.

 

 

“When you judge others, you do not define them, you define yourself” – Wayne dyer

 

 

What I believe is that the world could be a better place if we could learn to understand each other even when we think or act different, because it does any good to go through life judging people, nothing will change if we keep doing that, different would be if we could change a judgment for an observation, with the only purpose to help someone.

What I want you to understand is that is totally fine to disagree with another person, because we are all humans, but we have different beliefs, we think differently, we speak in different ways and we feel in different ways, everyone should walk their own path, but in order to find peace we should understand others and accept them as they are, because everyone acts according their vision of their world.

 

You deserve to be understood and not judged for the way you are as everyone else around you. So if you don’t want to be judged, do not judge others.