Tag Archives: Advise

Judge less, Love more

Judge less, Love more

 

The problem is we judge too much. We go through life judging everyone around us as if we were superior species from another galaxy whom they do everything well, and whom always make the best decisions. But the truth is that we are all humans and we all have the right to do whatever we want according to our own vision of life.

 

 

“Do not judge, or you too will be judged. For in the same way you judge others, you will be judged, and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you.” – Matthew 7:1-2

 

 

 

We waste so much time judging others than we forget to judge ourselves, and that is when the problem begins, because if we are going to judge, let’s judge ourselves first, and then we could see the reason why we act as we act every day, what will make us understand that everyone around us have also reasons deep inside their hearts to say the things they say and to act the way they act.

It’s easy for us to judge someone, what is hard for us is to put ourselves in someone else’s shoes. If we could do that, and if we could not only put ourselves in someone else’s shoes, but feel what that person is feeling deep inside their heart, I’m sure we would be surprised, and we will never judge a person again in our life.

 

 

“If you judge people, you have no time to love them.” – Mother Theresa

 

 

It’s easy for us to judge people all the time, it’s easy for us to judge people by the way they act, the way they speak, the way they think, the way they feel, the way they look, the way they dress, it’s easy for us to judge people for what they do and what they say and it’s easy for us to judge people through the decisions they make. And why is it so easy for us to judge? Because we don’t have an idea what another person has in its mind and heart and we are not even close to know how a person is feeling inside, because we can know the story of a person, but we can never feel what another person feels about something.

Judging others doesn’t make us better, but actually does the opposite, because we define ourselves every time we judge another person, and the act of judging others reflects how we feel about ourselves. Every time we judge, we express the lack of love for ourselves and for life, because it requires having in ourselves a lot of love, tolerance and compassion to not judge another person anymore, but understand them even when we disagree with them in all aspects.

 

 

“When you judge others, you do not define them, you define yourself” – Wayne dyer

 

 

What I believe is that the world could be a better place if we could learn to understand each other even when we think or act different, because it does any good to go through life judging people, nothing will change if we keep doing that, different would be if we could change a judgment for an observation, with the only purpose to help someone.

What I want you to understand is that is totally fine to disagree with another person, because we are all humans, but we have different beliefs, we think differently, we speak in different ways and we feel in different ways, everyone should walk their own path, but in order to find peace we should understand others and accept them as they are, because everyone acts according their vision of their world.

 

You deserve to be understood and not judged for the way you are as everyone else around you. So if you don’t want to be judged, do not judge others.

Superficial World

We are living in a superficial world where having a life and an appearance that looks good on the outside has become more important than looking good on the inside. We are more concerned about our external appearance that we forgot to pay attention to the kind of person we have become, a person who has forgotten that we are not just a body, but we are a soul which has body.

 

If the whole world was blind, how many people would you impress?

 

 

Relationship between humans have entered into a decay with almost no return, and why? Because we have changed our priceless values that we have as human beings for cheap rubbish, that has consumed our soul and spirit, forgetting what is really important, moving away from the path and losing control of our own lives.

Looking good and having a lot of material things have become the most important motive for our lives, we no longer focus in what kind of person we are, we don’t care anymore if we are a being of love, compassion, understanding or kindness, we don’t care anymore how we treat others as persons, because we don’t care how we treat ourselves, and if we do things to nourish our soul or not, we don’t care about anything of that, because we spend our time in making our external life to look good, and be accepted by others.

 

 

 

 

“Nowadays people know the price of everything and the value of nothing.” – Oscar Wilde

 

 

 

 

So what do we care if we don’t care anymore about our soul and our values? We care about how our image is viewed by society. We care about having the best clothes, the bigger the logo of the brand in our clothes the better, we care about having the more expensive house, car, mobile phone, television, and all the material things that have given us a wrong idea of happiness, we care about to have a great body and to be the most beautiful, we care about our makeup, hair, nails, we care about the tanning, we care about the new and absurd diet, we care about to have lots and lots of money, we care about being famous, about having power, and so on, an infinite list of stupid things created by those who dominate the world to entertain our minds and make us ignorant, so they can become more powerful, rich and do whatever they want with the world and every person on it.

The relationships between humans are a disaster, all the human values are in danger of extinction, humans are worried in their own businesses, and they don’t care what is going on with the person next to them, the world is dying thanks to us, there are people who have been forgotten by us, dying in agony, screaming for help, and crying in solitude, people whom nobody cares, because those people are too worried in getting more money, more power, more material things, more beauty, and more stupidity, so they don’t have time to help others, and some of them if they do that is only because they are looking recognition.

 

 

 

“I wish everybody could get rich and famous and have everything they ever dreamed of, so they would know that’s not the answer.” – Jim Carrey

 

 

 

 

So yes, this is a superficial world, where people are only worried about external matters, and when you are only focused on external matters, you forget to pay attention to the internal matters, and that can only lead us to a disaster, a disaster that you can see everywhere. Parents who are only focused in their jobs, their money, their house, their cars, parents that have forgotten about values, parents who are raising their kids with material things, and parents who want their kids to have a life and an image that only looks good on their outside, but they don’t see that their kids are growing with no values, no appreciation for life, for nature, or for other human beings.

There are also couples in a relationship that are more worried to be a couple who looks perfect in a photograph for social media, rather than being worried about being a couple who really love each other in every moment, day after day, those people in this relationship are more worried in their appearance, rather than being worried in being honest, loyal, and unconditional among them. People at work who are only worried about being the best, about getting more money, those people don’t care if they have to destroy another one to be successful. Friends who are friends in the good moments, but friends who disappear in the bad ones, friends who seems to be friends, but when comes the time to be happy for the success of the other one, they stab you in the back, while they smile you in your face, just because the jealousy within them consumed their heart.

 

 

 

 

“Beauty is how you feel inside, and it reflects in your eyes. It is not something physical.” – Sophia Loren

 

 

 

 

So I could just go on forever with this examples that shows that people are more concerned about external things while they don’t care about what kind of person are on the inside, I’m not saying we should not worry about getting better, or getting more money to get what we want, or getting a better job, or a better house, or car, or whatever, I’m not saying that we don’t have to try to look more beautiful, I’m not saying that we shouldn’t try to be successful in every aspect of our life, what I’m saying here is that we should prioritize our soul and spirit first, we should try to be better person, we should try to first love ourselves as we are right now with our perfections and imperfections, and we should try to be more kind, more tolerant, or to be more understanding, we should try to be more concerned about giving others what we want to receive, we should try to love each other more and then afterwards we should try to get all the material, recognition, power, or whatever you want in your life.

If we could try to look good in the inside first, and become a better person, every relationship between human would be less fake and more real, our love would be less fake and more real and pure, and then our life would be much better.

 

 

What you can give to this world as human being to make it a better place for you and others, to make it a place of love and peace, is the most important thing, all else is secondary.

Do Not Be Afraid to Be Alone

We live in a world, where being alone is something that scares us, that is why many time we lose ourselves, forgetting who we really are, being what we are not, in order to be accepted by others so we don’t have to face the dreaded solitude. But solitude is not something we should be scared of, but the opposite, as sometimes it is the best way to find ourselves.

 

“A man can be himself only so long as he is alone; and if he does not love solitude, he will not love freedom; for it is only when he is alone that he is really free.” - Arthur Schopenhauer

 

If we pay attention to what is happening around us, we can discover just by looking at people and their relationship with others, that actually being alone could be a benefit for our soul and life rather than a drawback, and you might be wondering why? Why it would be a benefit? Because being alone makes us reflect, it allows us to discover ourselves, because it is in the silence of our solitude where we can hear our inner voice. Solitude takes out the best version of ourselves, and it makes us find who we really are.

By being alone we allow us to move away from the outside world, and so we begin to think for ourselves, we question things, we start to find answers to our deepest questions, and sometimes that can be really hard, because it makes us realize that we were wrong in a lot of aspects in our life, especially in our idea of who we really are. So we start to listen to our own soul, and suddenly we find what we were looking for, we find ourselves.

 

 

 

”It’s beautiful to be alone. To be alone does not mean to be lonely. It means the mind is not influenced and contaminated by society.’’ – Jiddu Krishnamurti

 

 

 

Nowadays one of the biggest problem we are facing is that we actually don’t know who we really are, we just are what others wanted us to be, we are a product of society, so we accept that reality, but deep inside our hearts we feel incomplete, like if something was missing in ourselves, and so we found ourselves in the middle of a battle between the reality of our mind and the reality of our soul.

The problem is that not being alone with ourselves is blocking us to be what we really wanted to be. The fear of being alone makes us have the necessity to be with others, so we are what others want us to be in order to not be alone, or we surround ourselves with people who make us feel more lost, empty and the worst thing is that we find ourselves more alone than before.

 

 

 

 ”Don’t be scared to walk alone. Don’t be scared to like it.’’ – John Mayer

 

 

 

So I learned, that there is no way that you can find what you have been looking for, if you don’t start by loving to be with your own company. Once you know yourself and you do the things you love, and above all once you start loving yourself more you will learn that solitude is something that gives you the opportunity to be who you always wanted to be, and do the things you ever wanted to be. You will discover that being alone gives you wings to dream and discover a completely new you, without being affected and influenced by others, then you will enjoy life more, and everything that you have ever dreamed of will come true.

If we could just learn to be alone, enjoying our own company, we would find how amazing we really are, and what can we actually do without needing anyone else to do it. Therefore, do not be afraid to be alone, because it is not a punishment but a blessing, take advantage of it, and do not be afraid to talk and laugh with yourself. Enjoy your own company, do what you love to do, travel to the places you have always wanted to go, listen to your favorite music, or read your favorite book. Sometimes to be alone is what we need, because when we are only with ourselves we are free, and we are not influenced nor controlled by society, and that way we can enjoy being our true self.

 

 

 

”I think it’s very healthy to spend time alone. You need to know how to be alone and not be defined by another person.’’ – Oscar Wilde

 

 

 

Learn to be alone, do not be afraid to be only with yourself, love the silence, love your own voice, enjoy your own company, and feel comfortable being with your own soul. Learn to separate yourself from people who don’t let you be yourself, people who don’t let you grow and evolve.

When you stop being afraid to be alone, looking its positive side, you will learn to enjoy every second alone, and you become wiser at the time of choosing the people to whom surround yourself with. You will take your time to choose the right people, with no rush, without having the necessity to depend on others.

 

 

 

 ”I used to think the worst thing in life was to end up all alone, it’s not. The worst thing in life is to end up with people who make you feel all alone.’’ – Robin Williams

 

 

 

We are going to be alone many times in our lives, either by choice, or because there will be no other choice, sometimes we will face it abruptly, and in that moment can be very painful, but in that solitude that is not absolute, because nobody can be really alone if we learn to love our own company, you will find your own voice, you will listen to your soul, you will enjoy your own company, you will find yourself, and you will discover that being alone was not something negative, but very positive. Solitude is a gift if we know how to take advantage of it. You can change your situation at any time, you must simply change the way you see life.

 

 

 

Learn to love your own company, enjoy every moment with yourself, and change your life!