Category Archives: Keys for a happy life

Forgiveness will set you free

Forgiveness wil set you free

 

Forgiveness will set you free, once you choose to forgive, you choose to separate yourself from any negative outcome you had in the past, that still resounds in your present, forgiveness is not something you give to others, forgiveness is a gift you give to yourself.

 

 

We have wrong beliefs about what forgiveness really mean, and that is why we doubt every time we want to forgive. What we need to understand is that forgiveness is something you do for you; it seems as it something that you only do for another, but in fact, the result of forgiveness is something that will benefit you more than anyone else.

 

We see forgiveness as a gift to another, while that can have some benefits to others, and it can give some kind of peace in someone else’s life, it will never let someone to be free from being guilty, that is something that they have to do for themselves, they have to forgive themselves in order to be free.

 

“Forgive others, not because they deserve forgiveness, but because you deserve peace.” –Jonathan Lockwood Huie.

 

We see the act of forgiveness as an act of weakness, but in fact it requires a lot of courage and strength to forgive, it’s the way that you have to step aside from the victim role, and see everything with a different perspective, and it will give you the power to control a situation, without giving it the opportunity to control your thoughts, emotions and life.

 

What someone does to another, is a way to reflect how they feel deep inside their heart, because when you feel happy, and you love yourself, there is no way that you can hurt someone else, it is always the one who has a broken heart, the one who breaks someone else’s heart.

 

“When another person makes you suffer, it is because he suffers deeply within himself, and his suffering is spilling over. He does not need punishment; he needs help. That’s the message he is sending.”- Thich Nhat Hanh

 

So the best way to forgive, in fact the way we have to never have a motive to forgive again, it is by never taking something personally, even though an action seems to be against you, for the only purpose of hurting you, it is something never really done against you, but rather something that people do for themselves.

 

Think it this way: all of us have done something against someone, so first of all, nobody is innocent, so anybody can find a good motive to do something according to their belief, but what I want you to understand is that when you do something bad to another human being, you do that against you too, because what you give, you receive, is that simple, nobody that do a negative action can have positive feeling about it, the negativity and positivity simply do not go together.

 

“Forgiveness doesn’t excuse their behavior, forgiveness prevents their behavior from destroying your heart.” – Unknown

 

So knowing that, it is a very useful way to not take anything personally, what it will give you the opportunity to see everything from another perspective, you will not see yourself as a victim any more, and you will understand what is really happening and why is it happening.

 

By allowing yourself to seeing everything from another perspective, will give you a different reality, and you will understand them and forgive them, because you know that whatever somebody is doing to you, it is doing to himself too, because as I said before you can never do a negative action against someone and expect a positive result out of it, so that person is the first victim of all the pain that he is causing.

 

“The weak can never forgive; forgiveness is the attribute of the strong.” – Mahatma Gandhi

 

So allow yourself the gift of forgiveness, do not let any situation stop you from moving forward, and set you free from all pain and sadness from the past, using that as strength and as a motivation to keep getting better, because you do not want to be like them, and you don’t want them to win, being their victim, and you either want to be condemned for something you have done in the past, believe me, you are better than that!

 

Forgive others and forgive yourself from any past situation and you will be free!

Victims of expectation

Expectations

 

We are victims of expectation; the big problem of everything is not the problem itself, but rather our expectation about everything. Everything we say and do is accompanied by an expectation, and that is why sometimes our results are not as we wanted them to be, what it creates all the unnecessary sadness in ourselves.

 

Like I said before, we are victims of expectation, and that is why we’ll be disappointed over and over again, until we finally give up and lose, because if you are not careful, and if you don’t learn how to control it, expectations will always win, and if we get to that point where we let our expectations to win, then we get to the point where everything we want, every dream, every wish, every opportunity to make all of that become a reality, completely disappears.

 

After we have had a lot of results that haven’t met our expectations, We get to that place called disappointment, a place where we found unhappiness and sadness, and once you get to that place, it is really hard to get out from it, because after being there, Your actions will only be based on that, you will not have more expectations or at least good expectations, and you neither will have any vision of your dream.

 

“Expectation feeds frustration. It is an unhealthy attachment to people, things, and outcomes we wish we could control; but don’t.” – Steve Maraboli

 

Because once you are the victim of your own expectations, having as a result nothing more than disappointment, then you will walk your path with fear and doubts, having the belief that you shouldn’t have more expectations about anything, because not everything is possible, so your reality is going to look like that, and from now on you will face everything without enthusiasm, believing that it cannot end well based on your past experiences, and that belief will create your reality, and nothing will be like you have wanted it to be.

 

The problem with expectation, is that we have it because we actually need something. what it makes us be very attached to it, so we choose in first place something for what can give us, in order to satisfy that necessity, so if we don’t get what we want, we’ll be disappointed, and if we are disappointed, we stop believing, we lose faith and we forget about hope, so we accept a life of disappointment, sadness and suffering.

 

“Expectation is the root of all heartache” – William Shakespeare

 

So what we have to do, in order to be always happy without depending on the results, is not having more expectations, but what we have to do is make a decision according to what we feel and want in that moment without needing anything, giving all the best we can give, being happy, even if the result is not what we wanted, because we just decided to do something, because in that moment was what we wanted, not because we wanted to get something out of it.

 

Expectations give nothing more than disappointment, visualization gives nothing more than achievement. So what we have to do is to never forget whatever we want for our life, using the power of visualization, knowing that what we want exists and that sooner or later we are going to get that, forgetting any kind of expectation and being free to do, give and feel whatever we want.

 

“When you release expectations, you are free to enjoy things for what they are instead of what you think they should be” – Mandy Hale 

 

Remember that everything you give is a demonstration of what you already have, as we cannot give what we lack and we cannot receive what we don’t give. So everything you give, you will receive it back, multiplied.

 

So every time you want to have a new relationship, or get a new job, or anything you want to get, or achieve in your life, first you have to see your goal in your mind, and truly believe that is possible and that is a fact, and not having expectations, because you don’t need something, you already have it or you will have it, because you believe that!

 

“Trade Your Expectation to Appreciation and the World Changes Instantly” – Tony Robbins 

 

Walk your path fearless and doubtless, with confidence, truly believing that if something is meant to you, it will be at the best time for you. So do anything you want and feel, say whatever you want, think whatever you want to think, and above all love everyone around you without expecting anything in return, and I can guarantee that you will find true freedom and happiness.

Letting go of the past

Let go of the past
Letting go of the past, in order to be in the present, is the best way to have a happy, fulfilled and joyful life.

 

Our past consumes us, no matter how good or how bad it was, it consume us, and not only ourselves but it consumes our present and our whole life if you don’t let it go.

 

We live tied to a past world, which has defined us and which we now use as an excuse to be who we are and to act as we act now. Each of our decisions, every thought, every action, and every word out of our mouth is based on our past.

The experiences we have in our daily life, which generates our feelings, are not much different from others we already had like pain, sadness, anger, anxiety, happiness, excitement, joy, and so on. But our reality, the reality based on how we feel about what is happening has much to do with what has happened before. Our mind seeks similarities to past events and how we reacted to those events, which is why we react now as we reacted before, without giving us the opportunity to analyze what is really happening right now and act based on what we really believe and feel at that time.

Living tied up to the past creates fears, it create obstacles that prevent us to reinvent ourselves in every situation, it doesn’t let us go forward with confidence, blocking us, making us who we were and forgetting who we might be now. We stop doing things or we can’t go forward with our friends, romantic or family relationships, jobs, and so on, because in the past we have failed, allowing the past to cause fears and to define us as people who have failed forever. Or maybe our past was too good, so we live and we let us die in that past, without enjoying the present, and so as we are unable to let go of the past, we forget to live today in our present, so we believe that former days were better, we stick ourselves to that and so it reflects our current reality, a reality full of sadness and bitterness.

We bring the past to the present day after day, a past that dominate us, who speaks and acts for us, a past that blocks us and makes us prisoners, losing any ability to act, to think and to be what we really want to be, losing any possibility of freedom.

 

 

”Do not dwell in the past, do not dream of the future, concentrate the mind on the present moment.” – Buddha

 

 

Living in the past creates an imaginary reality, everything we perceive every day is based on what we have experienced, for what we live in an illusion, which only creates unhappiness since our feelings about what is happening to us day after day are wrong.

The past seizes our present, moving us away from everything we really want in life, we let the past to create our destiny for what can dominate us, so it can think and feel for us.

So then my friends, we don’t get anything we want, or we get it and then we lose it, and that is why we go after of anything we don’t deserve, and we just not value what we have now, because we live in our past, which defines us and makes us act as we act.

We move away from people who love us, we avoid relationships with people because in the past we haven’t been loved, and so by living in the past we cannot see the current reality and we see one that is totally imaginary, we believe that everything that resembles a past relationship that was unsatisfactory will be the same even if it indicates that is totally different. Or if in the past was good, but for some reason ended, we stay in that past where everything was better, and we believe that it will not be another like that one so we avoid any kind of relationship in the present. We avoid any situation that can generate suffering according to what we believe based on our past experiences, locking us in a prison that only creates that suffering that we once wanted to avoid.

 

 

”Oh yes, the past can hurt. But you can either run from it, or learn from it.” – The Lion King

 

 

We avoid going for what we want, we avoid making our dreams come true because at some point we have gone through a situation where we have failed, or in which we saw someone fail or where we have the belief that someone imposed on us that we can never achieve what we want because we simply don’t have the skills or abilities to make our dreams a reality, accepting that past as a present, and accepting ourselves as incapable and unsuccessful, accepting a reality that could be different if we just let the past behind, believing in ourselves and if we just lived in the present, since each second is a new opportunity to be who we really are, forgetting who we were or who they told us that we were.

No matter what happened in your life, what is important is that you are here today, that you can breathe and you can live, come back to the present, don’t let the past to keep defining you rather be the one who uses the past to a way of defining yourself, to a way to say this happened to me and I were like that but now I am what I am because of that, because I didn’t let the situation that happened in my past to destroy me, I used that as a motivation to become what I became now!

 

 

”No matter how hard the past, you can always begin again.” Buddha

 

 

No matter if your past was a total failure and if nothing was good for you, today is a new day, a new day to affirm and act as a new you, because you’re who you say you are, your failures, your fears, your old beliefs, whatever you have said, that doesn’t define you, you do that every day with your thoughts and actions, and you can create any reality you want to create.

 

You have the power and ability to change your whole existence, and how can you do that?

Leaving the past where it belongs, in the past!

 

It has been bad or good, it does not matter, leave it there, and with that you will also leave your fears behind as well. You will leave what you was before to become who you choose to be now, and you will get what you always wanted: love, job, friendship, experiences, and so on. Leaving the prison of the past behind, to return to be free again, to believe and dream, to make all your dreams come true, to define you as what you really are: a wonderful human being with an infinite capacity to get everything you ever wanted to have.

 

Live in the present, create your future, leave your past behind.